Thoughts on today.

My girls have been sharing a room for now until Banner can sweet talk Santa into another room makeover. Her loft bed seems to not be roomy enough for her anymore. It does not surprise me because she is as tall as I am already and is only 11 years old. However, it has been so sweet to see her and Blaise in the same room. I walked by last night and had to even get their Dad up to cruise down the hallway and take a peak. They were all snuggled up and Banner was reading a book to Blaise. They really seem to share a new closeness that carries on throughout the day and not just at bedtime.

It made me think about how not so many years ago most kids shared a room all the time and some still do now, although it is fewer and fewer. I know that the "closeness" has got to get old after some time, but I also would argue that families today are getting lost in their big houses and in their big rooms, every individual member going into their own retreats and usually carrying a phone to carry on their own conversation with someone outside of the house.

I remember going one time with the Richard's family to Dallas to get matching polka-dot comforters because two of the girls were sharing rooms. It was the coolest thing to me! They were the most cheerful, brightest things that my eyes had ever seen. (Blast from the past...but I think they came from Joskey's...spelling?) Also..in their home when we were young, you were not allowed to close doors. I was not too sure about that then when Margo and I were cooking up a plan on our own, but now I love it. This closeness of family and the love I have seen my daughters have reminds me of a verse that hits me every time I read it that our time here to love is so very limited.


"Show me, O Lord, my life's end and the number of my days; let me know how fleeting is my life. You have made my days a mere handbreath; the span of my years is as nothing before you. Each man's life is but a breath. Man is a mere phantom as he goes to and fro. He bustles about in vain; he heaps up wealth, not knowing who will get it." Psalm 39:4-6


I circled this verse and wrote beside it 10 - 11 and WAKE UP! I had to make an unexpected trip to Sammons Cancer Center a few weeks ago to have a few lumps checked out. Talk about a wake- up call! I was at Dr. Orms on a Monday to get his opinion. He called Baylor and they had me in the next day. I traveled to the familiar hospital alone because I have always felt strongly that in these moments when life seems so fragile, that I have to go alone.


I asked the Lord specifically as I drove north at 9:00 that morning that He might open doors, get me into all of the right people, and that I might could have all of the test, scans, etc. done in that one day. I did not want to have to spend the week making trips to and from Dallas. The Lord exceeded my prayer request, as He so often does, and I saw 3 doctors, had 2 tests done all in one day, and was back in my car headed south by 5:00 that same day. For those of you who have ever visited busy cancer hospitals, you know that this in itself is a miracle.


I was not only driving home that afternoon with everything done, but I was driving home with the news that I was fine! My lumps and bumps were nothing to be concerned about and my life in 2007 with fighting Hodgkin's is still past tense. All 3 doctors told me that I did exactly what I should have to follow through, but that this check-up was good.


So...what happens in that waiting room time. Let me tell you what happens. The music fades, the people around you carrying on conversations about work, handbags, and soccer games seem absolutely meaningless. 401K plans and the stock market do not amount to a hill of beans. The wrinkles on your face or new areas that could use a good dose of firming up are of no concern. The fact that you cook more, clean more, and are the only person in your home who sees the trash needs to be taken out or the dog fed does not matter. The unfinished project on your desk can wait or disappear totally and the sound of a text coming in is totally forgotten.

What happens in the waiting rooms of life, when you know that you may visit a health crisis again or even for the first time, is that you wake up to what matters. You totally get focused. I felt like the Lord took my face in His hand and literally turned me towards Him and said..."Let's think about these things, Betsy Elaine now that I have your full attention..."


The things I needed to think about would not matter to you. Your list would be different. When I sat alone in my 3rd waiting room that day, the above verse I mentioned came to life. I will NOT, I refuse to....live my life going to and fro and not love those around me, taking the time to color, go for a walk, make my nephew his favorite snack, or sit on the back porch with my Dad, Mom, husband, and the rest of my family as they share their Sunday afternoon talks, or love the kids who I am blessed enough to see daily at work. I have a family, and extended family and people in my community who the Jesus has given me to love and serve! It has nothing to do with me or my wants, my time, my to-do list for the day, or the fact that I think for the time being that life is not fair.


I am thankful and I am not just going to say that today because I am in the mood of thanksgiving and already full of ham and pecan pie. I will say I am thankful and I will live my life in a DIFFERENT way because I am thankful. I will not just give thanks with my words and hold it in my heart, but I will act on it! I will decide what matters and live like it does. I will LOVE and SERVE! I will also disregard the American Dream that says we all need more power and more money to be happy. What we need is God, family, and to LOVE for everyone around us, in the same way Jesus loved when He walked here on earth. I will not bustle about in VAIN or run around like a chicken with my head cut off because I am so busy, but I will wake up each day, pour myself a cup of coffee and ASK...What is it today, Lord? What should WE do?

short, but sweet!

SO...I have a new bike. It is really a gently used bike that my mother in law found at a garage sale in Dallas. This is NOT the fancy kind of bike that you see bikers on with their spandex suits and helmets. It a blue, big-wheeled bike that needs a basket on the front and seems to be looking for a spot for a picnic. It is that kind of bike and perfect for me!

Brazos needed to take the trash last night to the dumpster and I rode with him. Who am I kidding? I rode behind him and even had to stop a few times because my legs were on fire! The way back was a whole lot more fun because it was downhill! I got going pretty fast as I rounded the final curve by our house and nearly wanted to kick my legs out and coast...it was so much fun! Right about the time that I hit the curve, I hit some sand....and started to skid! I nearly lost it. I was so close to a total wreck! Brazos did not see me. Thank goodness he was up ahead of me. He would still be cracking up.

When I caught my breath finally and regained my balance, I stated laughing. It was so funny and I was so happy that I did not fall! I giggled like a kid. It was a CLOSE CALL and I kept my balance and did not fall. What a great feeling!

It occurred to me that I have the same feeling when I am close to a WRECK with a comment or word and I hold it in! I can save myself from so much when I just hold onto my words and control my mouth. It also makes me smile when I pause and think...and then decide to keep my mouth shut...just like it made me smile when I regained my balance and did not fall off of my wonderful, new bike.

There can be balance in life and we can control our words, even our thoughts and feelings. We do not have to live daily as if life is one wreck after another. There is so much energy spent in the cleaning up from our own wrecks. Life, or my bike rides I guess, will not always be smooth and easy, but there is a way and there is hope.

It is simple..."Jesus, help me today to control my mouth. Let the words of my mouth be pleasing to you."